Oct
No more Sad Clown…
Alright friends, yesterdays post was a little too “Sad Clown” for my taste, so today, we’re going old school… I gots jokes!
This was the first Mormon joke I ever heard, and a MISSIONARY told it to me. Even better is that said missionary told me this joke during an illicit, unsupervised picnic that me and my bad girl posse had taken him and his companion on. I’m sure you’ve all heard it, but here goes:
Q: Why do you always invite two Mormons with you when you have a bbq?
A: Because if you only invite one, he’ll drink all your beer!
*sidenote: We did not have any beer on our illicit picnic with the missionaries. However, I did hold hands briefly with the cute missionary when no one was looking.
Ok, one more.
If you can believe it, my MOM told me this one and I love it:
A Mormon Bishop got on an elevator on the 10th floor. The elevator stopped on the 8th floor and a beautiful woman walked in. On the way to the lobby the gorgeous woman hit the stop button. She turned to the Bishop and said:
“Can you make me feel like a true woman?”
The Bishop said: “I sure can” and excitedly took off all his clothes and threw them in the corner of the elevator. He turned to the woman pointed to the clothes and said:
“Now fold them”.
PLEASE feel free to share your favorite Mormon joke in the comments. Or even just your favorite joke, doesn’t have to be Morg related.
Sister Secret Sad Clown Underpants loves all ya’ll!!
I totally rented Saturday’s Warrior just to make my (non-mormon) husband watch it. The only super awesome part of the whole movie is when the missionaries are all desperate about the fact that they haven’t converted a single person and he grabs some kid of his skateboard and shouts “Hey kid are you eight?”
AHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!! LOVE it! I haven’t seen Saturday’s Warrior in a million years and I barely remember it. I’m going to follow your example and find it- I think I’ll enjoy it waay more with a nice drink in hand.
The first one is hilarious. The second one makes me shudder.
A Mormon couple go together go to the doctor to find out why the husband hasn’t been feeling well. After a series of extensive tests, the doctor suggests the guy go wait in the car so the doctor can talk to the wife.
The doctor sits the wife down, and says, “Your husband has prostate cancer. He will most certainly die unless you perform oral sex on him three times a day.”
“Oral sex?” says the wife.
“That’s right.”
“Three times a day?”
“Without fail.”
The woman returns to the car. Her husband asks “What did the doctor say?”
“You’re gonna die.”
HAHAHA!! Very nice, very nice…
Here’s my favorite bad Morg joke:
The Pope’s secretary comes to him and says, “Your holiness, I have good news and bad news.”
The Pope replies, “What is the good news?”
The secretary says, “Jesus is on the phone.”
The Pope replies, “Really? That’s great news? What’s the bad news?”
The secretary says, “He’s calling from Salt Lake City.”
LOVE!